In a Mother's Arms
by Sad-Blue-Eyed-Angel 2010
Summary: A prequel to the story Fly Away Home and Greatest Gift - Details parts of Alan's life and how it was being raised by his mum in New Zealand before he was forced to move in with his papa whom he's never met. Mentions of abortion and adultery. May trigger. No flames This is AU, so plot doesn't follow the original Thunderbirds story.


**_A/N: I put the Maori words in bold in the story so that anyone reading this could go down to the end of the story to see what the Maori language translates to. I hope you all read and enjoy this sort of prequel to Fly Away Home and Greatest Gift. I did skip around a couple years in the story, because it was meant to highlight parts of Alan and Lucy's lives as Alan grew up with just a mother who played dual roles. Please no flames!_**

* * *

In a Mother's Arms

Gazing out sadly, Lucy watched as the sun came and went. Jeff was gone. He'd told her of his wife Maureen and her diagnosis of ovarian cancer. They'd spent the night together two months prior and Jeff was gone before sunrise. She knew the thing they had was brief and that it couldn't last, but she still wished to go with Jeff and be there with him. Sitting at her window seat, Lucy bit her fingernails. When the egg timer she'd set went off, Lucy got up and walked across the room to the bathroom.

Stopping at the counter, Lucy picked up the little white stick to check the results. Closing her eyes, Lucy tried to harden her nerves. With a hard swallow, Lucy opened her eyes. Positive. Placing a shaky hand against her chest, Lucy tried not to cry at the news. She was pregnant and with Jeff's baby. He was her first and only partner she'd ever had and now she was with child. Putting a hand over her mouth, Lucy checked the pregnancy test another time to make sure it wasn't giving her a false report. When she saw the words still said positive, she knew it wasn't a lie. She was pregnant and after checking her calendar decided she was two – almost three months along with the baby.

It all made sense now. The feeling queasy in the morning, the unusual cravings, the mood swings…it all made sense. She was pregnant and was almost three months along. As she walked out into her bedroom, Lucy sat on the foot of her bed as she looked at the test a third and fourth time. She couldn't believe it. She was only twenty eight…how in the world did she get pregnant after one night of fooling around? It was just one night.

She knew she was going to keep her baby. She wasn't much liked among the villagers, because she wasn't the chief's actual daughter – having been adopted as a baby. She'd been outcast a lot growing up and so she doubted she'd ever find a husband. Putting her elbows on her knees, Lucy contemplated just what she was going to do. She'd need to begin a nest egg and try to prepare for the baby's birth. She'd also need to find a place to live, knowing her papa would just as soon deny her a place to live than to shelter her and her unborn illegitimate child. Standing up, Lucy walked over to her vanity; picking up a pen and pad of paper. She took a seat and began making a list of things she'd need to do to make sure her baby was well taken care of.

… … … … … … …

A few days later, Lucy walked into the kitchen where her mother stood, Lucy looked at the tiny grainy image she held in her hand before she sucked in a breath. Raising a timid hand, Lucy knocked on the door and her mother turned with a soft smile.

"Come in my dear. Are you feeling better?" Ari turned to look at her daughter and noticed her oldest was wringing her hands. "What is it dear?"

"Mummy, I'm so sorry." Lucy said as she hid the picture in the pocket of her apron. She began to cry and her mum came over to hug and kiss her face.

"What is it my dear?" Ari asked as she delicately cupped Lucy's face. "What could be the matter that you'd begin to cry?"

"Don't hate me…please." Lucy said as she tried not to cry openly any more than she already was.

"Why would I hate you?" Ari asked when Lucy began fumbling in her pocket.

"I…I'm pregnant." Lucy said as she began crying earnestly in her hands. Ari looked at Lucy's stomach, seeing the tiny and barely there swell of a baby belly; before she spotted the white film in Lucy's apron pocket.

Ari plucked the picture from Lucy's pocket and her breath caught as she looked at the grainy image of a baby. It was so tiny, looking like an alien like jelly bean. Ari looked back up at Lucy and instantly latched onto her daughter hugging and kissing her face. She wasn't happy that Lucy was pregnant and not even married, but she was happy nonetheless that she was going to be a nana.

"I'm gonna be a nana?" Ari asked as she hugged her daughter tighter, kissing her cheek.

Lucy still in her mother's arms and looked to the woman with tearful brown eyes. "You're not mad?"

"No! I get to be a nana. That's all that I've wanted since you and your sister started talking about babies and what it'd be like to become mummies." Ari replied, understanding that this must have been what had been on Lucy's mind lately. Her daughter seemed almost skittish and was forever sneaking off and hiding when the family gathered for meals or to just hang out after work or school. "Who's the father? Should we be planning a wedding?"

Lucy began crying again at the thought of Jeff. He'd never know the result of their night together, never be there for the birth of his newest child, never be there for their son or daughter's first step or first word…he'd never know plain and simple because he left to go be with his wife and sons. She shook her head before she spoke up.

"There is no father…mum he left the night after we slept together. He wasn't from New Zealand." Lucy watched as her mother's face paled and she feared she'd be out on her ear by her mum and papa. She was so stupid to allow Jeff to sleep with her and not realize she was at the time where she could get pregnant. She wasn't on birth control or anything like that because she assumed nobody would ever be interested in her like that.

"So what are you going to do sweetie? You certainly can't raise a baby on your own." Ari said as she held her daughter, running her hand against the soft swell of her daughter's tummy. Her grandbaby nestled safe and warm in his or her mum's womb.

"I don't know, but I am going to try. I'm not getting rid of it." Lucy replied as she gently ran a hand over her tummy, taking comfort in the feel of her belly.

"Your papa is going to be furious." Ari said as she looked seriously at her daughter.

"I know, but can you keep it a secret? Until I get stuff figured out? Please?" Lucy begged, afraid that her papa would kick her out and leave her destitute and alone…pregnant as well.

"I can't honey, what would he say if he knew I kept your pregnancy a secret?" Ari said as she cupped her daughter's cheek, thumbing away her tears.

"Not for months mum, just until I figure out a place I can stay if papa kicks me out. Please, I don't want to be living on the streets while I am pregnant." Lucy begged, tears highlighting her eyes.

Ari looked deep in thought before she nodded. "Okay, you have a week…then I need to tell your papa what you just told me."

Lucy nodded solemnly, knowing she would likely be told to get out and to never come back. She'd take what she could get and if a week was all she got then that's that.

"I'm going to be a nana!" Ari said as she looked at the tiny jelly bean on the film of paper.

… … … … … … …

Lucy sat in the living room, listening as her papa ranted and raved over the discovery of her pregnancy. He'd seen Lucy when she was in the kitchen with her mum over the past few days and had seen his wife Ari stroking Lucy's belly tenderly as if she were caressing something locked safely away inside Lucy. After watching his wife and daughter interact for a few days, it occurred to Heriko that both Lucy and Ari were paying an awful lot of attention to Lucy's belly and with a brief blast to the past, Heriko was reminded of when Ari had gotten pregnant with Lucy's younger sister Ana. Ari had paid the same amount of attention to her belly then as Ari and Lucy were currently. That's when it became clear that Lucy was hiding something and it was something that Heriko was not happy about in the slightest.

"My daughter, I thought I raised you correctly! You were supposed to remain pure until marriage, not become a whore!" Heriko admonished as he walked back and forth in front of Lucy in the family living room.

"I am not a whore papa, it was just a one-time thing! I swear I never intended to get pregnant!" Lucy argued back at her papa when he wouldn't calm. He'd been yelling at Lucy for almost an hour now and Lucy was beginning to get angry that her papa wouldn't let her explain.

"It doesn't matter if it was a one-time thing or not! You have slept with someone and you have gotten pregnant by him! You aren't married and you aren't even betrothed to a guy. How am I supposed to know that he'll treat you and this baby right if I don't know him?" Heriko calmed himself with a sharp exhale as he crossed the room to gently cup Lucy's cheek. "You are my daughter, I only want what's best for you and getting pregnant by a guy that you had a one night fling with is not the way to make your papa proud."

"I know papa…but none of the boys in the village like me like they like Ana. Jeff showed me what love was and I…I know it was wrong but I couldn't help it." Lucy tried to explain to her papa. Her papa stiffened at the mention of Jeff and his face became red with anger once more.

"Jeff?! The drifter? He told you he was married did he not?" Heriko ran a hand over his mouth as he tried to figure his daughter out. She not only slept with a guy and had unprotected sex, but she'd gotten pregnant and what was worse was that he was married and he'd cheated on his wife with Lucy.

"He's not a drifter papa! He came here for work!" Lucy argued, but stopped when her papa held up a hand to halt her protests.

"You see why I called you a whore young lady? Proper young women don't go out and fool around with married men and they certainly don't get pregnant with an illegitimate bastard…get rid of it or so help me…I will do it for you!" Heriko demanded before he stormed from the living room. He was fuming and he couldn't believe his daughter had been so foolish.

… … … … … … …

Lucy argued with her papa day in and day out over his decision for her to have an abortion. Those in their small village now knew of her pregnancy thanks to someone overhearing her and her papa arguing about the baby in the kitchen and spreading the news around the village. Her papa kept insisting that she not carry the baby to term and that was pretty much all their conversation revolved around anymore. It wasn't until she began to show her little four month belly that her papa quit insisting she abort the pregnancy. Her mum couldn't get enough of the baby belly and was feeling Lucy's belly every chance she got.

"I can't feel him kicking yet mum. The doctor says I won't feel it for maybe another month at the latest." Lucy giggled as she stood at the front counter, her mum's hand gently stroking her belly with the utmost care.

"I know, but it's still so amazing." Ari whispered as she smiled at her daughter. "Why do you call it a boy? How are you so sure it's not a girl?"

"Because Ana and I tried the pendulum test and Ana's ring swung from side to side. That means it's a boy." Lucy admitted. "And I haven't really been having but occasional morning sickness. Not at all like what you had with Ana."

"We'll have to try the test again sometime so I can see it." Ari said as she ran her hand over Lucy's bump once more with a soft smile. "I still can't believe I'm going to be a nana."

… … … … … … …

Over the next few weeks, Lucy baby bump gradually got bigger, forcing Lucy to wear large muumuus to give her comfort. For a first time pregnancy, Lucy was surprised that her belly got as big as it did. So far she was only six months pregnant and already she looked as though she were already in her ninth month of pregnancy. Even in her sixth month of pregnancy, Lucy barely felt the baby move. Every time she thought she felt the baby, it'd be a brief flutter of movement before going still once more and it frustrated not only Lucy but Ari and Ana to no end. All three of them were hoping to feel the baby give a flurry of movement and when none of them felt it, it made them feel disappointed.

Lucy sat on the stool at the front counter, waiting for a customer to come in the door to hopefully check into the inn when she thought she felt it. Putting a hand on her belly, Lucy put her hand down near her belly button when she felt it again.

"Mum! Ana! Come here!" Lucy called with a smile that could be compared to the glow of the sun. "The baby just kicked!"

Ari and Ana came running from the kitchen, flour dusting their hands and aprons. Ari had some flour dusting her dark brown hair and cheek while Ana had flour up to her elbows. Both mother and daughter hesitantly touched Lucy's belly despite the flour and both marveled at the jab that poked their palms when Lucy tickled her belly to illicit the baby's movement.

"He kicked!" Ana squealed happily as she felt another jab nearer to her pinky finger. Looking to her older sister and mother she smiled at the look of awe on her mother's face.

Ari leaned over and kissed the top of the swell that was Lucy's belly as she felt the telltale roll of the baby moving positions in his mummy's womb.

"Hello **taku e aroha nei** , I'm your nana." Ari said soothingly when she felt the baby settle under the gentle strokes of Ari's hand on Lucy's belly.

… … … … … … …

Lucy tried on a number of occasions to get Heriko to feel her belly and try to connect with his grandson, but Heriko wasn't having it. The man refused to accept the baby as his grandson and heir to the family business, because he was conceived in a scandalous manner. Even as the months of Lucy's pregnancy progressed and the size of her belly expanded as the baby grew more.

Once more Lucy was sat at the counter, signing in a couple residents to their room when Heriko finally felt Lucy's belly. He walked up and put a hand on Lucy's back which he knew was sore from the weight of the bump she carried everywhere with her. When Lucy gave a wince at a kick the baby delivered, Heriko placed a hand against the bump and murmured to the bump.

" **Tetahi iti whakarongoa**. Settle for your mummy." Heriko murmured as he smoothed his large hand over his daughter's belly, feeling the baby contained within give a roll before apparently going to sleep. Lucy looked at her papa, wide smile mixed with awe directed at him. "It is time for your lunch break dear, go before your mum drags you back to the kitchen."

Lucy nodded and slid from her perch. She gave her papa a hug, smile firmly in place as her papa gently rubbed her belly once more. Pressing a gentle kiss against her papa's scruffy cheek, Lucy walked away. Her papa trailed his hand against her belly, his fingertips dragging languidly before separating once the distance between Heriko and Lucy became too great.

… … … … … … …

Lucy walked around her family's small living room, pacing, breathing and trying not to cry. The baby just wouldn't settle and Lucy was so tired. At eight and a half months pregnant, Lucy was finding sleep evasive. She couldn't get comfortable in bed and she couldn't stand sitting for any length of time despite being on a cushy comfy surface. Sucking in a breath, Lucy tried to make her belly relax. She'd begun experiencing false labor pains and had been feeling them for a week now.

Starting another circuit around the living room, Lucy continually tried to ignore the tightening of her belly. Her mum and papa banned her from the front desk when she began experiencing her false labor pains, relegating her to the living room at the back of the inn; Ana stayed with her, keeping track when Lucy had a false contraction and timing it…just in case.

"Do you want me to go get mum?" Ana asked as she stood behind Lucy, rubbing her back when Lucy came close and doubled over, bracing against the couch as a contraction consumed her.

Lucy shook her head, the eighteen year old thought having their mother in the room was the answer to everything and honestly all Lucy wants is to have Jeff back in her arms, whispering words of comfort as she labored with their child, her first…his fifth. The thirty year old man who spoke of dreams and love while they lay in bed that night so many months ago…Lucy just couldn't quit thinking of him. She wondered if his wife was doing better, if her illness had gone away. She hoped so despite the fact that she loved Jeff with all her heart. If you love someone, let them go is the saying, not that Lucy necessarily wanted to.

"I don't want mum…I want Jeff." Lucy groaned as her face contorted into a grimace. That contraction hurt more than the last. Ana didn't listen and she left Lucy alone in the living room, going to retrieve either their mum or papa to help Lucy. The eighteen year old didn't know how she could help her sister considering she didn't know the first thing about childbirth or labor for that matter. Lucy clutched at the armrest of the couch and gave a whimper as the pain of the contraction intensified slightly. That one hurt.

Ana returned shortly with their mum in tow, the older Maori woman went to Lucy – clucking softly as she brushed Lucy's bangs from her face. She placed a hand gently on Lucy's belly, caressing it as she tried to determine if Lucy was in actual labor or not. When Lucy gave a soft whimper of pain, Ari directed her daughter out of the living room and down the hall to her own room where they'd planned for her to birth the baby.

Lucy's room was far enough back in the inn that her laboring wouldn't disturb the residents staying on the second and third floor. Ana and Ari held either of Lucy's arms and supported the petite blond as she shuffled slowly from the room. Once they'd gotten Lucy into her bedroom, Ari helped her daughter to lay down.

"Ana, go call Dr. Kirkwood. I'd like for him to come check Lucy and make sure everything is alright…and let your father know that Lucy might have gone into labor." Ari said as she rubbed Lucy's back when she rolled onto her side. Ana nodded before she departed from the room. The eighteen year old was back within several minutes and her papa followed into Lucy's bedroom. Heriko sat on the side of Lucy's bed and ran callused palms over Lucy's head when she gave a whimper.

"How are you feeling **tamaiti kotiro**?" Heriko whispered as he rubbed a warm hand over Lucy's hard as rock belly. "Is the **iti nanakia** hurting you?"

"Papa…" Lucy whimpered as she felt pain lance up across her belly forcing her to close her eyes and breathe deeply. When the pain receded, Heriko who'd held Lucy's hand released her hand to brush her bangs up behind her ears. The village chief leaned forward to press a tender kiss against his daughter's forehead.

"It'll get better soon **aroha**." Heriko reassured as he got comfortable on his little girl's bed, prepared to stay with her through the worst of her labor. That Jeff character that caused this wasn't here so Heriko would take the pleasure and privilege of comforting his daughter while she delivered Jeff's spawn. The chief might have been more accepting of his grandson if he'd at least been conceived in a normal manner. Such as Lucy having slept with her fiancé…at least then Heriko would have been able to use the fear and respect he received from the villagers to remind the males not to think with their dicks. Lucy was his daughter and his responsibility. And right now he feels like he failed as a father to her for not catching on to how much time Lucy was spending with that Jeff guy quick enough to stop their little tryst from happening. The conception of that… _thing_.

… … … … … … …

Ari stood on the other side of Lucy, holding her left foot in hand while Ana held Lucy's right leg and foot in her delicate grasp. Heriko was dabbing a cool damp towel across Lucy's forehead as she sucked in several deep breaths before she sat up to push once more. Dr. Kirkwood sat at the foot of Lucy's bed, hands at the ready to catch the baby as he neared his chance to exit his mother's womb in order to enter this world.

"All right Lucy, give me one more big push." Dr. Kirkwood said calmly as he helped guide the baby's left shoulder out of his mum. "That's one shoulder out kiddo, just give me one more push…that's it."

Lucy cried out wearily as she felt a slight burning pain before she was rewarded with an angered gurgling cry as her baby finally exited her body to enter this world loudly. As soon as she felt the pressure leave her, Lucy dropped back in exhaustion. Her chest was heaving as she sucked in several breaths, same as looking at her papa while he finished dabbing the sweat from her face. Dr. Kirkwood placed the squalling newborn on the towel that had been spread out on Lucy's chest and stomach. Ari and Ana cried in unison at the cry of their newest family member while Heriko ignored the wrinkled baby that continued to scream loudly in the room. Dr. Kirkwood clamped the umbilical cord and prepared to cut before he handed Heriko the scissors. Heriko tried to hand back the utensil but Ari scolded him sharply.

Lucy panted as she was finally given a break from the intense pain and burning sensation in her lower half. She looked at her papa with watery eyes, watching as the man she looked up to cut the cord of her newest son and his newest and so far only grandson. Once Heriko cut the cord, he handed Dr. Kirkwood the scissors and focused on dabbing a cool damp towel against Lucy's forehead as Dr. Kirkwood removed the squalling newborn from Lucy's chest. Heriko bowed his head and kissed Lucy's cheek, congratulating her on a job well done softly.

Once the baby had been cleaned up and swaddled in his blanket, he was brought over to Lucy. The new mum was leaning against a couple pillows that her own mum and papa packed behind her, once the baby was placed in her arms, Lucy smiled down at the small pink face. She kissed the baby on his button nose before she turned a smiling face up to look at her mum and papa.

"Good job **te honi**." Ari whispered to Lucy as she gazed upon the delicate newborn. "What's his name?"

Lucy looked down at the baby in her arms and smiled tiredly as he opened his eyes, taking her breath away. He had Jeff's blue eyes.

"Alan…his name is going to be Alan. Alan Shepard." Lucy whispered as she kissed the baby on his button nose once more.

Once Lucy had been cleaned up, Ari retrieved her camera and took a picture of Lucy – she looked tired in the picture. One day when Lucy and eventually Alan when they'd glimpse the photo, they'd see a newborn and wrinkly baby Alan in a tired and red faced Lucy's arms.

… … … … … … …

Lucy paced the floor in her bedroom, bouncing the squalling month old baby in her arms. She didn't know what she could do, he'd been crying nonstop for several hours now. He rarely if ever did this, especially this long.

"Are you ever going to get it to quit crying?" Heriko hissed as he entered Lucy's bedroom. He was wearing his housecoat and his hair was stuck up in several different positions.

"I've been trying, but I don't know what's wrong." Lucy replied tiredly. She yawned and sniffed as well as tried to fight off the need to sleep. "I've tried nursing him, I've tried changing him, burping him, I've even been singing to him…nothing works."

Heriko sighed with exasperation as he shook his head. He stepped forward and took the screaming baby from his mother.

"Go, go on and lay down. I'll handle him." Heriko said as he pushed Lucy to her bed. She sank down and gazed up at her papa as he gently bounced Alan. Once Lucy was laying down, Heriko moved to sit in the rocking chair that he'd crafted by hand for Ari just after they'd adopted Lucy. He began to rock back and forth slowly and as he spoke Alan gradually quieted down. "I will tell you the tale of our ancestor's before us and how we came to live on this island. You will listen and listen good…"

A quick glance to Lucy proved to Heriko that his oldest daughter had fallen asleep. Looking back at Alan he spoke again. "You will listen because one day…as happened with me you could become chief of this village. I do not approve of your sire, but you are here now; you make my daughter happy and one day I hope you will prove to me just how much you want to be a part of this family."

Alan looked wide eyed up at his **ruau** and once Heriko felt like he had Alan's attention, he began the tale.

"There once lived in Hawaiki a chief called Uenuku, who had seventy-one sons…"

Heriko continued to spin the tale of how their ancestor Paikea found his way to the land in which they lived at currently. Alan soon fell asleep, placed under a spell by the story of his family's ancestors. Once Alan was asleep, Heriko looked down at the baby in his arms and gave a small smile. He didn't care much for the baby, but the little guy was starting to grow on him. Every small smile, every little gurgle the baby in his arms made proved to lessen the ice frozen around his heart.

"You better be good to my girl…I know where you live bub." Heriko said before he swiftly kissed Alan on his nose. The man maintained a cold exterior when talking to the people in his life, refused to accept his grandson for what he was, but on the inside – the man had grown to love the baby just as much as his daughter when she'd first been adopted.

… … … … … … …

"Come on Alan…come on…come on!" Ana coaxed as she knelt before the teetering infant. Alan held onto Ari's hands and struggled to stand on his own. Lucy was out on a date that her papa had convinced her to go on, leaving Alan with his nana and auntie Ana. Heriko was around but he tried to maintain a distance from the ever growing child. Heriko however stepped into the room just about the time that Alan let go of Ari's hands and proceeded to wobble precariously on two unsteady feet. Ana cheered softly as did Ari. Heriko stayed quiet but looked down as Alan teetered toward him.

"Bah!" Alan cooed as he looked up at his ruau. He held his hands up, using the universal sign for wanting to be held and Heriko gave in.

"What are you doing you **iti makimaki**?" Heriko asked as he tolerated Alan touching his face and chin with slobbery fingers.

"He loves you…" Ari said softly even as Alan laid his head on his ruau's chest and began to play with his necklace.

"Who could love an old **tangata** like me?" Heriko asked even as he looked at the rosy faced baby that smiled up at him. He graced his wife and youngest daughter with a soft and gentle smile to the baby that rested his head on his chest. Ari and Ana both smiled peacefully themselves at the loving sight and when Lucy finally returned home from her date she glimpsed the sight of her papa cradling a slumbering Alan in his arms. Alan was suckling in his sleep and Lucy felt her heart melt at the beautiful sight. She knew her papa loved Alan in his own way, she just wished he'd accept her son like she hoped he would one day.

… … … … … … …

"Alan get in here." Heriko said softly when Alan snuck by his ruau's study. A tiny blond head poked into the room and large blue eyes met Heriko's dark brown ones. "Come here Alan."

Alan walked into the room, his head bowed like he was being punished. He stopped before his ruau and tentatively looked up to meet his eyes. The five year old scuffed his feet as he struggled to maintain eye contact with his ruau.

"What do you have to say for yourself after this morning's disaster?" Heriko asked as he looked at his grandson seriously. The five year old looked browbeaten but he still spoke up in reply of his ruau's question.

"I just wanted to make mummy some breakfast." Alan said as he broke eye contact with his ruau to look down at his feet.

"You. Are. A. Boy…boys never go into the kitchen let alone cook! That's girl's work! Are you a girl?" Heriko asked sharply, making Alan wince.

"No…I'm not." Alan said softly.

"Then what were you doing in the kitchen? You know better!" Heriko scolded. He left his chair and went up to Alan and grabbed him about the arm and pulled him over to his chair. With quick efficient hands, he quickly lowered Alan's shorts. Alan let out a small whimper, but he remained quiet when his ruau laid him over his knee and proceeded to swat him a number of times. Alan gave a quiet sob as he received his punishment, that was at least until his mum entered the room and snatched up her son from her papa's lap.

"What are you doing to him?!" Lucy scolded as she hurriedly pulled Alan's shorts back up, but not before seeing the red hand prints adorning her son's backside. She picked Alan up and settled him against her hip, being careful not to touch his bum because she herself had been on the receiving end of her papa's spankings and she knew they hurt for a little while after. "Why were you spanking him?!"

"He broke the house rules." Heriko replied as he cast a stern eye to his daughter.

"He's a little boy! I know about him trying to make me breakfast, Ana told me but I don't think what happened this morning requires a spanking!" Lucy scolded as she cuddled Alan tightly against her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'll take _my son_ out for our walk!"

With that said Lucy left her papa's study and brushed past her mum and younger sister with her baby in arm. Ari and Ana watched sadly as Lucy brushed a couple of fallen tears away after the argument with her papa.

Lucy clambered out of the house and down the steps still holding Alan. She walked away, huffing angrily until she reached the very beach where she met her one true love. She set Alan down and proceeded to sink down to sit in the sand with her baby. The wind lightly blew around them, ruffling Alan's soft locks of hair. Alan crept over to sit in his mum's lap where she continued to cradle him gently.

"Mummy?" Alan asked softly as his eyes widened at the sight of tears in his mum's eyes. "Mummy, I'm sorry."

"It's nothing you did baby." Lucy comforted. "I just wish it could be you me and your papa out here today."

Alan looked at his mum with questions alight in his eyes as he tried to understand what his mum was saying. "Where is papa mummy?"

Lucy looked at Alan and gave a soft sob before she hugged him tightly. Alan hugged his mum back and they just sat there for a little bit until Lucy decided to answer.

"Your papa is…he's…he's not here." Lucy was forced to admit. Her eyes contained the sadness which her heart spoke of loudly every day, as it had for years.

"Why?" Alan asked, curious about his papa. He never had one before and he wondered why quite often.

"Because…he wasn't from around here and he had to go back home." Lucy stated, not wishing to tell Alan that his papa had been married. It'd be too confusing for a child Alan's age to understand that he didn't have a papa because his papa didn't know he existed.

"Will I ever get to see him mummy?" Alan asked. He got to see his mummy every day, why couldn't he see his papa too?

"Probably not baby. I don't know how to reach your papa to tell him about you." Lucy said, when in truth she had a mailing address for Jeff…she was just scared to tell him about Alan. She was afraid of what his wife would think of her, what she'd think of Alan knowing that Jeff had cheated on her with Lucy and got her pregnant to boot.

"Oh…" Alan replied softly, if not more than a little sadly.

"But I'll tell you what. Mummy will love you double to make up for papa not being around. Okay **te honi**?" Lucy asked as she hugged Alan tightly to her chest. Alan nodded with a soft hum of agreement before he turned to look at his mum.

"My bum hurts." Alan whimpered as he rubbed a hand over his backside.

"Oh I know it does. ruau was always very good at making spankings do their job." Lucy gently pet Alan's hip, knowing she'd have to be careful of playfully swatting Alan's bum to get him moving. His bum would be sore for a few days, Lucy knew that pain all too well.

… … … … … … …

A little over two years later found Lucy walking down to the school to pick up Alan. It'd seem Alan and another boy got into a scuffle and they both threw more than a couple punches. She'd gotten a call from the principal of the school and Lucy barely managed to get Ana to watch the front desk. Her little sister was still in the 'honeymoon phase' with her new husband and her mind was on anything but work.

When Lucy made it to the school, she was greeted with the receptionist holding a cold rag to Alan's nose which was bleeding slowly while the other boy had a bag of peas pressed to his rapidly swelling eye. Lucy sighed as she glimpsed the boy that started the fight with her son. Both boys knew each other since they were in diapers and neither of them could ever really get along. Lucy couldn't understand it, but assumed it was a dislike over the fact one had a papa and a mum while her little man had just a mum and no papa.

"I'm sorry for the trouble." Lucy said as she bowed her head in apology to the little boy, the principal and receptionist. A moment later the other boy's mum and dad entered the room and walked to the boy with the bag of peas.

"Boys will be boys." The other boy's mum said as she removed the bag of peas to inspect her son's eye. The boy's papa however turned to Lucy and sneered when he saw the other involved party.

"Lucy, I see it's your problem child that caused this." The man, a guy Lucy refused to date back in school said as he eyed her son with a hint of barely concealed disdain. "If he had a father to tan his hide the proper way, maybe he'd be a good boy."

Lucy glared at the man, he'd always treated her and her son with cruel words. He felt angered when she refused him and his advances and so took it out on the small family.

"He doesn't need a papa to raise him right. He's got me and that's all he needs!" Lucy replied hotly. "Come on Alan, let's go."

Lucy picked up Alan's backpack and shouldered the weight of his schoolbooks as she led her son from the office. Lucy felt pinpricks of angry tears but she refused to let them fall. True Alan needed a papa to teach him the ins and outs of being a man, but that thankfully had been taken on partly by his ruau and Ana's new husband. Her brother in law was an honorable man and Lucy was thankful for him.

Lucy walked with her arm around Alan's shoulders. She was doing a good enough job at raising her son…wasn't she? He was only seven and a half and he was turning into what Lucy hoped was a proper young man. He was contentious and sweet, helped his mum, aunt and nana in the kitchen when his ruau was outside in his shop or at village meetings. He held the door open for people and the few times they'd gone into town and needed to wait for a bus to take them to the other side of the island, Alan would give up his seat to his elders (didn't matter if they were elderly, sick, with child, male or female) Alan was just kind that way.

"I'm sorry mum." Alan said softly as he hung his head. He knew it was wrong to get into a fight, but he was just defending himself. Defending himself and his mum's honor. The other boy had called his mum a name that Alan heard a few times when his mum and ruau would argue and it was usually said by his ruau to his mum.

"It's okay **taku e aroha nei**. I just wish you and the other boys would get along." Lucy murmured as she led her son to the beach where she met his papa. It was their place and it was something they did at least once a day – going down to the beach to watch the water lap at the sand and enjoy the sun, maybe even see their ancestors greet them from the north shore, the great whales blowing water from their blowholes and rising above the surf.

Alan leaned back into his mum's chest and let her hug him close as he lost himself in thought. They sat and just listened to the soft sigh of the water leaving the sand and returning to the ocean. His mum began playing with his hair, blonde like her own though a shade lighter. His mom began humming a song and Alan recognized it as his lullaby. It was from a movie, that much Alan knew but his mum wouldn't let him watch it because it talked about the kinds of things adults got up to. His mom said it wasn't appropriate for someone his age to watch, but she still sang the song softly.

Alan was silent as he listened to the abridged version of the song, he'd heard the original and it was a mother singing about her daughter – his mum changed the girl parts to include him – so Alan heard it as a song sung from a mother to her son. When the song ended, Alan who'd been silent asked his mom the question that was the main reason for the day's fight with the other boy.

"Mum? What's a slut?" Alan asked.

His mum stilled when she heard the word and she turned Alan to face her.

"Where did you learn a word like that? That's not a word that children can say." Lucy admonished.

"It's what Rawiri called you. It's what caused us to argue and fight." Alan said softly as he kept his eyes down. He knew it was an adult word, but he was curious what a slut really was because Rawiri used it in reference to his mum. And the times he'd heard his ruau call his mum that, he saw how mad it made her and he saw how mad it made his aunt Ana and Nana to hear that word.

Lucy's eyes watered. She hated to tell Alan the meaning of the word, but she knew if she didn't Alan would probably go to his ruau or nana and ask and she didn't want either of them to tell Alan what it meant. Defiantly not his ruau, his ruau could be cruel and he'd tell Alan the wrong thing and give Alan the wrong idea. She'd rather tell Alan first so he'd know the true meaning of the word.

"Alan, a slut is a woman who has many casual sex partners." Lucy said softly. "I know you don't need to know this, but your papa has been my only partner. I'm not a slut, but I know the truth and so do you and if anybody ever says it to you again – keep your tongue. Don't add fuel to the fire. Should anyone ever call me or anyone you know that word, don't pick a fight. You know the truth so there isn't any point in picking a fight over the issue."

Alan looked around before he hugged his mum. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what **aroha**?" Lucy asked.

"For getting into a fight, saying that word, not being able to defend you." Alan said as he buried his face in his mum's blouse.

"I don't need defending **taku e aroha nei**." Lucy said as she kissed the top of Alan's head. "But thank you."

Alan nodded silently before he sniffed. He loved his mum's smell. It was comforting, smelled of the ocean and flowers. His nana smelled like the bread she bakes every day while his aunt Ana smelled of oranges. He paused as he thought of his ruau. He smelled like smoke. Like the herbs that would burn down in the chieftain's hut. Alan could recall everyone's smell and he wondered idly what he smelled like to his mum. Was there a smell that comforted her?

"Mum?" Alan asked.

"Hmm?" Lucy hummed as she gently brushed Alan's bangs behind his ears.

"Was there ever a smell that reminded you of something?" Alan asked softly. Lucy smiled at the question, because yes there was.

"Yes, baby. There have been smells that remind me of something. Why do you ask?" Lucy asked as she herself caught a whiff of Alan's unique smell and smiled. Even as he grew, Alan still carried the scent of fresh laundry and baby powder, though Lucy sometimes wondered why. She wondered if it was his clothes, she had a habit of letting them hang on a line and air dry outside their bedroom window. Then she smiled again as she thought of Jeff. He smelled of cigarettes though he never smoked while visiting New Zealand. He did say though that his wife smoked occasionally, maybe he carried the scent of her cigarettes because he was close to her often? The smile fell away from Lucy's face as she thought of Jeff, he was married and she never stood a chance. Another woman had his heart and she'd never get the chance again.

"Just curious." Alan murmured as he settled into his mum's arms.

… … … … … … …

Heriko walked forward, dressed in the traditional garments of the chief. Alan stood with his mum, aunt and uncle and nana as the chieftain's family. Alan and many of the other boys were also wearing traditional outfits as this was a big day. Today was the day that most of the boys in the village that were old enough would step up from boyhood and begin their journey unto manhood. The boys ranged in age from nine to thirteen. Alan was between the ages at ten years old. His nana stepped forward and began to chant, soon followed by his mum and aunt. The three women under the chief chanted and soon was joined in by the rest of the tribe. Men and women alike chanted and the boys that were to begin their manhood training were ushered forward. It was a ceremony that many of the boys were excited about.

Alan had face paint on, swirls painted by hand by his aunt under his chin and on the right side of his face making him look like a warrior instead of like a boy. His outfit was a grass skirt that went down to his knees and he was bare chested like the other boys. He unlike the older boys of fifteen was without a tattoo. He wouldn't get one until his fifteenth birthday. So in the meantime, he'd have to have fake tattoos painted for any ceremony he was to attend.

Heriko used the end of his staff he carried and he pounded the butt into the ground to silence those gathered. When they'd silenced, the boys selected to begin the manhood trials knelt on the ground and bowed their head in respect of their village elder.

"Welcome, you boys have gathered here today to mark the day that you will leave boyhood behind. As of today, you are on your way to becoming a man." Heriko said as he looked at each of the boys, Alan included. The boys all kept their eyes facing toward the ground until they'd been called forward by their chief to receive the **hongi** _._ When Alan was called forth, he closed his eyes and pressed his nose and forehead to his ruau's nose and forehead. His ruau exhaled and inhaled which Alan did also as he was taking in the breath of life. Once Alan and his ruau finished the hongi, they pulled apart and their eyes met before Heriko picked up Alan's hand and raised it above his head. The tribe applauded and cheered as they accepted the several boys that would be beginning their journey through manhood. Alan walked towards his mum and nana with a wide smile. He was happy, very happy indeed to be beginning his journey. When he got a bit older he could begin taking lessons from his ruau about what he'd need to know when he had to take over the tribal chieftain's duties.

"You boys will now mandatorily be enrolled in haka lessons and eventually you all will learn how to wield tiahas. You will be our tribe's warriors and in the face of battle you will defend your tribe with your life. Anyone who doubts their abilities, or doesn't wish to take on this responsibility you can leave but you will have forever shamed your families." Heriko said with a neutral look on his face. Alan turned to look at his ruau. The man though sometimes cruel was an honorable man. He looked after the people in his tribe and if anyone needed help, he was there to help in any way he could. Alan hoped that one day when he became chief that he could live up to his ruau's standards.

"Come on aroha, it's time for the feast." Nana said as she led Alan away by the hand. Alan followed his Nana, smiling over his shoulder at his mum and aunt.

… … … … … … …

Alan stood under the eaves at his haka school, backpack hanging from one shoulder gazing out at the rain. It was pouring down pretty hard. He wondered what he and his mum would do for the night when they'd gotten home from the hour away haka school.

"Hey, what are you doing out here eh?"

Alan looked over his shoulder to see Rawiri. They'd eventually become friends over the years of having to attend haka classes together. They had to, occasionally Rawiri's parents had to give him a ride rather than leave Alan to get there some other way. They had to get along to not kill each other and the more time they spent together, the more they realized how much they had in common. It didn't matter that Alan didn't have a papa and only a mum…all that mattered was their friendship.

"Watching for my mum." Alan replied.

"If you need a ride, my papa wouldn't mind giving you a ride…yeah?" He gestured to the vehicle Rawiri's papa drove and the man waved from within the vehicle.

"Nah, my mum will be here soon. She told me when she dropped me off that she'd stick around to get me rather than head home in this weather." Alan said as he shook his head no. He smiled his thanks at Rawiri and waved at Rawiri's papa. "You'd better go, it's getting late."

"Okay…well I'll see you tomorrow right? My house for the movie night?" Rawiri asked, making sure Alan would be there. He, Alan and a few other boys would get together at Rawiri's house and stay the weekend and have a movie night starting Friday nights and ending Sunday afternoon.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow." Alan said with a smile as he and Rawiri grasped hands and did what they called a secret handshake though it was more like giving each other high-fives and clapping the other on the back with an open palm.

Right about that time Lucy pulled up in her own vehicle. She waved at Rawiri and his papa as they backed out of the driveway of the school. She unlocked the door for Alan and the boy sprinted across the yard before he jumped in the vehicle to avoid getting wet.

"Hi mum." Alan said before he reached back and grabbed his safety belt.

"Hello aroha. How did haka practice go?" Lucy asked as she backed out of the driveway as well.

"It went well. Master thinks Rawiri and I can advance soon." Alan said with a smile. He was glad he and Rawiri eventually became friends. The boy was actually pretty nice, if not a little rough around the edges. He did apologize for calling Alan's mum a slut when they were younger, and apologized to Lucy herself when Alan's aunt Ana heard Rawiri apologize to Alan.

"That's good." Lucy said as she slowed to take a curve in the road. "It's raining cats and dogs out there isn't it honey?"

Sending a fond smile Alan's way, Lucy continued to drive.

"Yeah, though it'd be a little weird if it really was raining cats and dogs…don't you think?" Alan asked with a grin.

"That it would be. I think if that was the case, the inn would become an animal shelter because you and I would have to rescue the poor dears from the other cats and dogs." Lucy replied as she sent another smile over at Alan. She chuckled as she returned her gaze back to the road. "When we get home you should show your ruau your haka. I think it'd make him proud."

"Maybe…" Alan said as he squinted. A pair of bright headlights rounded the corner of the road, apparently racing with another car. Alan screamed. "Mummy!"

A split second passed, Lucy tore her gaze from the road and glanced toward Alan before she instinctively threw one hand in front of Alan to keep him pressed back in his seat. It didn't matter that Alan was wearing a safety belt restraining him, it was mother's instinct to protect her child. With one hand, Lucy turned the wheel sharply to avoid the high velocity vehicles. While she missed the head on collision, Lucy was unfortunate enough to lose control of her vehicle. As the car began to roll, Lucy and Alan both combined screamed in fear. Their screams however were drowned out by the sounds of shattering glass, crunching metal and the boom of the vehicle making impact with the ground as it rolled. When the vehicle stopped, both Alan and Lucy fell silent.

The rain continued to fall and rained down on the wreckage. A vehicle rounded the corner and came to a stop as they saw the smoke pouring from the vehicle that lay on it's top. Rawiri and his papa gazed on in shock. Rawiri's papa handed Rawiri his cell phone before he removed his seatbelt.

"Rawiri call the paramedics. Tell them there's been a car accident." Rawiri's papa climbed from the vehicle but not before throwing one last command at his son. "Do not get out of this car, I mean it!"

… … … … … … …

Rawiri frowned as he dialed the number to the paramedics. Hs eyes never left the car that lay on its lid. His voice shook as he reported the accident. He watched his papa run to the vehicle and drop to his knees to look inside the wrecked car. Rawiri hated to admit it, but he knew the car and he only hoped Alan and his mum were okay.

… … … … … … …

Rawiri's papa dropped to his knees alongside the driver's door and looked up in the car to gaze at the woman he once loved. He felt the burn of tears as he saw the blood drip from her nose and his gaze traveled to that of her son. Alan was out cold and neither of them was moving. Alan's arms dangled above his head and Rawiri's papa spoke up.

"Lucy, Alan…its Ahera. Please Lucy, Alan…answer me!" Ahera begged and pleaded as he tried to get either mother or son to awaken. He yanked on the door, hopes of getting it open…but to no avail. The door was jammed and Ahera knew it was because of laying on the lid of the vehicle. He reached in and cradled Lucy's face in his hand. He once loved her, had intended on asking her papa for her hand. But when he tried to court her, she refused him. She told him she didn't like him like that and no matter how many times Ahera tried – she continued to refuse him. He even tried up until she got pregnant with Alan but by then it hurt too much to know that Lucy truly didn't return his feelings. He'd become cold towards Lucy and bedded the woman who had been vying for his attention and got her pregnant with Rawiri. Both Alan and Rawiri had been born in the same year and both boys knew each other growing up. True neither of them got along very well, but when Ahera realized he could still love Lucy and Rawiri's mum the same, he let go of the hate and hurt. He began to speak nicer to Lucy and convinced his soon to be bride to spend time with Lucy and to leave him with both boys.

Alan and Rawiri soon became fast friends and Ahera could soon see that Alan was in fact very mature for his age and well adjusted. He started to spend more time with Lucy included in the mix and realized that she loved him, but more as a sister loves her brother. And he soon realized that he loved her but as a brother loves his sister. So it was heartbreaking to see the accident, not just come upon it and to know that in that car was his first love and her son.

"Lucy, please answer me." Ahera pleaded even as he heard a siren in the distance. "Alan…"

Ahera stayed with Lucy and Alan, keeping a close eye on them to be sure they were both still breathing. He sat in the pouring rain and kept an eye on his son who was watching from the front seat of the vehicle. When police and paramedics showed up, it was an officer who kept Ahera restrained while they extricated Alan and Lucy from the inside of the vehicle.

Ahera stood off to the side as he watched paramedics remove Lucy's son from the vehicle. The boy was covered in blood. And Ahera wasn't sure if it was all Alan's or if it was Lucy's. He watched in the pouring rain as the paramedics fastened a brace around Alan's neck and got him laid on a stretcher. One of the paramedics looked at Ahera before he gestured for Ahera to come over.

Ahera walked over and watched as they loaded Alan into the back of one of the ambulances.

"Do you know the boy and his mum?"

Ahera nodded before he looked back at Rawiri. "He's my son's best friend and he's my godson."

"Do you and your son want to ride with to the hospital or would you rather drive?"

"I'll drive. Which hospital are you going to?" Ahera asked. He needed to know so he could call his wife and Lucy's family to tell them where to go.

"Do not follow us through the red lights." The paramedic said before he told Ahera where the ambulances were going to take the auto accident victims.

… … … … … … …

It was a while later that Ahera sat in the A&E department in the hospital. Rawiri sat beside him and they all watched the doors that Alan and Lucy were taken through. They being Ari, Ana, Heriko, Ana's husband Hirini, their children and Ahera's wife Rea. They all sat there watching for signs of the doctor who was seeing to the mum and son that'd been brought into the department.

When the doctor finally came through the door, it wasn't with good news. Lucy had passed away, the intercranial pressure from hitting her head on the steering wheel had killed her and Alan was still unconscious. He like his mum had hit his head and the doctor was telling them if Alan didn't awaken soon, they'd classify Alan's unconsciousness as that of a coma and would continue to treat Alan. But there was nothing more doctors could do for Lucy, she'd gone many minutes ago and though they gave their best efforts – they'd been unable to revive Lucy.

Ahera began to cry earnestly in Rea's arms, not just for the loss of Lucy but for Alan too. The boy had no papa in his life and now he was considered an orphan. Rawiri wept openly for the loss of his godmother and best friend's mum. He loved Lucy like an aunt and he looked up to her. Now she was gone and his best friend had nobody.

Ari fell apart at the seams when she heard of Lucy's passing. She crumbled to the ground and cried loudly. Ana joined her mum on the floor as her husband cradled their children close. The doctor watched with an impassive face before he backed away from the hall. Heriko sat with his head bowed in solemn silence. He didn't cry immediately, but he did hang his head in sadness. When a nurse came to take them all to see Alan who'd been moved out of recovery and into his own room, that's when Heriko snapped.

"He's not my grandson!" Heriko said venomously. The nurse was taken aback by the statement but she gestured to the rest of the family to follow her to see the boy. Rawiri jumped at the chance to see his best friend and Hirini was joined by his and Ana's children, Ahera and Rea. Ana, Ari and Heriko were left alone.

"Stop it!" Ari hissed back at her husband. "He is your grandson and you can't blame him!"

"I can and I do! It's his fault that…that my little girl is dead!" Heriko finally allowed his emotions to show and he cried hard over the loss of his daughter. She may not have been his blood, but he still loved her. Right from the moment Heriko held the sweet newborn in his arms, he'd fallen in love with her. Now his baby was gone. She was gone and all he had left was her son…a child Heriko didn't want to accept. He'd only accepted Alan to make Lucy happy.

… … … … … … …

It wasn't until Alan woke up two days later that he was told his mum had perished in the accident. It hadn't been his nana or ruau or even his aunt and uncle to break the news…it was his godparents who'd told him with the doctor present and it was his best friend that hugged Alan when the child needed consoling. When Alan finally did get to see his nana and ruau, he'd been blown away when his ruau announced that Alan was no longer welcome at the inn or in their family. Alan's nana was dragged from the room by his ruau and Alan was left in silence as the doctor told him to give Heriko some time to come to terms with Lucy's demise.

Alan knew his ruau though and he knew he truly wasn't welcome back home ever again. He sat in silence as the world continued to turn and life continued for everyone except Alan. When Alan was allowed to leave the hospital, Alan found out that it was his godparents and best friend picking him up and taking him home. To their home. Ahera would be taking Alan to the inn the following day to gather his belongings and then they'd return to Ahera's home. Alan would be staying with them for a while.

When he returned to his home at the inn, his nana had convinced Alan's ruau to let Alan stay for a few days. It was obvious they knew something Alan didn't. But he didn't wish to find out. He packed what few belongings he actually owned and a few days later it was revealed that the child and welfare of New Zealand had managed to get in contact with his papa in New York. Alan would be going to live with him.

He cried and went to Ahera and Rea. He didn't want to live with his papa, he didn't know him. He'd rather live with his godparents, at least he knew them and they him. Ahera was forced to break the news though that Alan was not officially his and Rea's godson. Lucy had told Ahera and Rea she wanted them to be his godparents but they never got it in writing…so despite Alan had a family that was more than willing to take him in, their hands were tied. They had no claim over Alan and it was with a heavy heart that Alan got on the plane that would take him to London. Alan had received word that he would be picked up by a guy who worked for his papa and would be taking him to see his new family.

… … … … … … …

Alan gazed out the window as the plane flew. His bottom lip trembled and his eyes welled with tears as he watched home he ever knew get smaller and smaller the farther they flew. He was scared. Scared and tired and sad…so incredibly sad. ' _Death would be easier than this_.' Alan thought to himself. He soon cried himself to sleep, uncaring to the passengers around him. None of them acknowledged him, so he refused to acknowledge them.

When the plane landed a few hours later, Alan was shook gently by a flight attendant. She smiled at him and gestured for him to get off the plane. He grabbed his carry-on bag and walked off the plane with the others. They'd all kept to their own business, so Alan followed suit. He walked down to the baggage carousel and grabbed his bag before turning to find the man who would be picking him up. His gaze flitted over everyone standing around with cardboard signs. There…there was the man who'd be picking him up.

Alan swallowed thickly before he started towards the man…looks like this was it. The start towards his new life. A life away from the family he ever knew and a life without his mum. A life with strangers at a new home. How he wished he was in his mother's arms instead.

* * *

 **1** ) Taku e aroha nei - My love, **2** ) Tatahi iti whakarongoa – Hush little one, **3** ) Tamaiti kotiro – Baby girl, **4** ) Iti nanakia – Little rascal, **5** ) Aroha - Love, **6** ) Te Honi - Honey, **7** ) Ruau - Grandpa, **8** ) Iti Makimaki – Little monkey, **9** ) Tangata - Man, **10** ) Hongi – A traditional Maori greeting used in meetings or major ceremonies – is similar to that of a formal handshake but is done when both parties press their nose and forehead together. Hongi is also known as the Breath of Life

 **A/N: So I don't know if anyone has noticed, but FF is having issues with reviews being seen. I can see the reviews in my email, but if they are really long - they get truncated and then I am not able to see the rest of the review. So if anyone by any chance writes a long review, could you maybe send the review to me so that I may read it in a private message? Sorry for the extra work, just asking that if anyone reviews it, send me an additional copy in a PM so that I may read the entire thing. That would be much appreciated, then if the review gets lost I can go back and review with a copy of your review as a guest reader. I hope they get this issue fixed, because it's bumming me out that I can't see anyone's reviews on the site.**

 **Also, some of the aspects in this story are made up entirely to continue the plot...I did research on rite of passage for Maori tribes and couldn't find anything except tattoos being a rite of passage. I didn't want to give Alan a real tattoo so I made it painted on and not something considered okay until he was sixteen. The ceremony was simply because I wanted there to be a public ceremony where Alan and his ruau had to interact in public so that people could see he was traditional even in public. Hope you all enjoyed this story, it took several months to finish. And if anyone is curious about what the chanting sounds like, you can find a video on YouTube titled Maori Haka & chant (traditional music) - the cover is a young woman staring straight ahead.**

 **Reviews are much appreciated.**

 **Thanks!**

 **Sad-Blue-Eyed-Angel 2010**


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